COMPUTER BUSINESS REVIEW

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Issue Date: September 2001 (es)

Waxing dack

1 September 2001

Waxing dack
Even workaholics must leave the office sometimes, but that does not mean they do not miss the pretentious verbiage and buzzwords. Now, thanks to the dack.com JavaScript-powered toy ( www.dack.com/web/bullshit.html), with a simple click of the mouse, you can generate crocks full of mindboggling doublespeak to make you feel corporate or, perhaps, prepare lingo to fertilise an important presentation.
Instructions:
1. Click the make bullshit button.
2. Watch bullshit appear in the box.
3. Repeat to taste (use your Enter/Return key).
Some choice corporate verbiage:
* repurpose extensible networks
* architect synergistic communities
* seize open-source paradigms
* maximise distributed communities
* brand clicks-and-mortar infrastructures
* incubate robust e-tailers
* deliver compelling ROI
* reinvent next-generation metrics
* engage viral methodologies
* transition turnkey interfaces
* harness strategic content
* innovate granular e-commerce
* engage virtual action-items
* whiteboard open-source vortals
* reintermediate ubiquitous markets
* repurpose interactive experiences
* deploy mission-critical convergence
Here is what the critics are saying
Wow, if only we could all evolve vertical relationships; imagine a world in which innovative front-end technologies ceaselessly synergise turnkey networks; it would be a landslide, a paradigm shift, a breakpoint. Now all I need to do is visualise my bleeding-edge niches and I will be complete... - Grayson C.
Using the bullshit generator, we were able to replace our entire marketing staff. Thanks! - Jay B.
The bullshit generator is bullshit. I saw the same stuff 10 years ago. - Anonymous


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